Years ago, I was in a relationship that I appear not to be able to recover. After the break, would send this person flowers at the date of our first anniversary and are an excuse to call or send the search for signs of hope for the future. Even when they are serious with someone else, I continue to torture me by the recall to their subject and have fantasies about how I was going to win back them one day. Sounds familiar?
Depression normally following the breakdown of a relationship is considered by most practitioners of mental health in the ordinary course of mourning. When I went through it, although the pain feels unbearable and behaviour which accompanies it, childish and even embarrassing to say the least.
Why do many of us get so attached to another person? Physiologically, when we have a partner liaison occur a series of chemical reactions involving the release of oxytocin. In fact, we become junkies oxytocin!
Sociologically, we are committed to each others intended to raise babies, keeping the other company and continues to the human species. Spiritually, proximity, that we feel with our partners is similar in many respects our relationship with the divine and the feelings of unity. But when a relationship is is more common - or because one of the partners wants to or for any other reason - it is time to release and let go, must abandon all expectations for the future, and that allows you to stream with the good and the new who seeks to speak in your life.
The following guidelines will help you release a person when it is necessary, and instead holding dying after it is finished. They form the basis of what I call 'The Language of Letting Go':
1. Give you the permission to cry and grieve. Let any feeling of depression, sadness and loss passes by without judging them! Pain do you kill, and move through you freely once you are will open your heart and let it flow!
Surrender 2 at every moment of the DivineAvoid trying to make something happen with your former partner. The confidence that if you are supposed to be together, eventually this will be the case. In the meantime, stay open new opportunities to give and receive love of friends and the people around you.
3 Put the focus on yourself and your own life.Often times we can search our partner is something that we think was missing in our lives. By turning your attention to yourself and by asking powerful questions such as "what is the greatest potential of my life?" you heal. Its time for you to come in your own!
4 Forgive to be free.Stop blaming your former partner or another person of the debacle. Acting on anger and bitterness will be poison your emotional body. Assume responsibility and remember you chose to remain in the relationship and ignored signs that things were not flow. It is time to move forward and take an inventory of all the lessons and forgive yourself and your former partner for errors. Write a letter you send or perform a ritual, freeing for their good more high. Imagine the links between your hearts, sexual organs, cut the minds and souls. Say goodbye to loud and in your heart. This can be very painful, but you will feel much better after.
5. Keep your heart open. .A broken heart is a heart which is the widest opening. A recent study parents of baby AIDS shows that those who have loved their baby with all their hearts until he is dead recovered their grief much faster than parents who refused to bond with the baby or drop out in an attempt to avoid the pain. This means that which remains open heart heals faster!
The language of Letting Go can often seem difficult to learn and difficult to speak, so please be gentle with yourself. You learn how to fully love and accept yourself and your feelings, to give in to every moment to the divine, with emphasis on your own life and the latent potential, forgiving yourself and others, while you keep your heart wide open, you will be awake in the awareness that this apparent endpoint is just a new beginning in your life!
Of course, I wish that they had taught me this school!
Gabriel Gonsalves is a writer, filmmaker, ordained Minister and teacher of practical spirituality and unconditional love. Based in Cape Town of the Cape, he is the founder and spiritual director of the Agape, a trans-confessionnelle spiritual community based on the teachings of the wisdom of the new thinking/antique. He is also Director of operations at the Novalis Ubuntu Institute of holistic Studies.
Gabriel loves to apply the spiritual truths, it is learned in all areas of his life as he shares with all those crossing its flight path. Through workshops, seminars, weekly flights on Sunday, meditations guided, coaching sessions and online courses it inspires and allows other happily living their life more great, celebrating each time that they give their largest gift in service in the world.
Works and articles of Gabriel has been presented in the ODYSSEY MAGAZINE and pink language. For more information about Gabriel, visit his website http://www.gabrielgonsalves.com/
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