This may be your first Christmas after your divorce or separation, no doubt you are already worrying about how it will go.
My best advice to you is, stop worrying and get organising.
It's not fair or reasonable to expect other people to organise things for you - they might and that will be a bonus.
If you have children try to keep your adult issues out of the picture, focus on making it a great day for the kids. Many divorced couples manage to get together as a family for birthdays and Christmas, it will mean a lot to your children if you can do that. If not, either split the day fairly or agree to have the children on Christmas day alternate years. Most of all don't make them or the rest of your families suffer, your divorce is yours to deal with.
If you don't have children try something a bit innovative. Ask around to find out if there are any elderly people living alone in your area, many families are scattered around the globe these days, this means that elderly relatives often have to spend Christmas alone. You could invite some of your neighbours or members of your church to your home, give them a day to remember.
You might prefer to help feed the homeless this year, the Salvation Army and other charities are always glad of helping hands to serve cook and serve Christmas dinner for poor or homeless people.
You could dedicate Christmas Day to yourself, plan to have all your favourite treats, get your favourite films to watch, get up late and plan to catch up with people on Boxing Day.
Christmas Day, like every other day, will be exactly what you make it. You can have a great day if you decide to create a great day or you can have a dull and lonely day if that's what you decide to have - all you will have to do to achieve this is - nothing!
That's right, sit back, relax and do nothing. You might get lucky, family or friends might invite you to join them, but don't expect them to.
Expectations can ruin relationships and Christmases!
This year, put other people first - especially your children if you have any.
Look out for people less fortunate than yourself, you'll find them all around when you start looking.
This year, plan to make Christmas as special as you can, for as many people as you can - and make one of these people yourself. Just don't expect someone else to do it for you.
Hello, I'm Mary Moir, most of my career has been about people just like you. Wives, husbands, families.
What I've learned is that you need to feel good about yourself to have a good relationship and be a successful parent. At http://www.yemanyacoaching.com/ you'll find all you need to get your life and your relationship back on track. Or, how to recover after a divorce.
http://www.yemanyacoaching.com/
Put the life back in your living!
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