Admit Responsibility
No matter what the situation is between you and your spouse or if you believe your spouse needs to chance in order for your marriage to be fine, just know that it take two people to make or break a marriage. In one way or another, you're also at fault for the current state of your marriage. A successful couple does not mean they're always happy, but are in a relationship that manifest a broad range of emotions within their marriage. This means, you and your spouse should experience all your emotions together, even with negative emotions like anger, fear, anxiety, sadness and so on.
There are some people who believe that a good marriage consist of two happy couples. This is an unrealistic perspective because being constantly happy is unrealistic. There is no such thing as a perfect marriage because there is no such thing as a 'perfect' person. You're not perfect and neither is your spouse-- we all have our flaws, this is what makes us human. When two imperfect people come together, it's impossible for a perfect marriage to result out of them. Who decides what is perfect anyways?
Be Accepting of Your Reality
Accept your spouse for who they are and what they say or do. Being in acceptance means you don't resist the reality of what you can't control. If a situation already happened, it is out of your control.
If your spouse did or didn't do what you wanted, do not bear a grudge against them. If you tend to hold onto negative feelings towards your spouse, you're not allowing whatever happens to be okay. When you focus on what you don't want to happen, you add more pain to your situation.
Instead, learn to let go of what you can't control. This doesn't mean you're not allowed to be sad or upset, just don't add any more suffering to your situation by trying to resist what happened. Learn to accept what happened and aspire to positivity because you can only more forward.
Understand What You Can or Can't Control
The only person in your marriage that you have control over is yourself. This means you can't make your spouse feel or desire anything. The more you try to control their feelings by telling them what they need to do (be more loving or affectionate), the more you will push them away and make matters worse in your marriage.
You cannot demand for your spouse's affection, you must attract it. The root of successful couples is when each individual feel successful in their own life. This means, avoid relying on external circumstances to make you feel happy about yourself. Take responsibility of your own feelings and work on improving parts of your own life (without your spouse) that you feel is lacking. This will help you feel amazing, without relying on the love of your spouse. Once you begin to feel good about yourself, you will attract your spouse and begin to have positive interactions with each other once again.
What if you just can't get the love back in your marriage?
I know how hard it can be to try and make your spouse understand just how special your love is, but if you want to really make your marriage sing again, you'll need to learn a single method that works amazingly well.
This method is simple to pick up and it doesn't take much practice, you can read how to do it in my free report here: Fix a Broken Marriage.
Don't give up hope, it's NOT impossible. Learn more reasons Why People Divorce before it's too late for you and your spouse.
Mika Maddela has been helping men and women connect on a deeper and more satisfying level for many years. She specializes in improving personal self-development as well as cultivating a lasting and rewarding relationship. Mika is also an avid traveler and lover of all kinds of food. She enjoys drawing and finding beauty in all things simple.
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